Looks like Sh*t, Tastes like Heaven Chocolate Cake.


Hi, I’m Samantha, AKA Geeky Sweetheart/The Geeky Seamstress. I blog about my sewing misadventures over at Geeky Sweetheart, preparing for mine and my husband’s first child over at TeensyGeek, and the general crafty-geekiness that the bountiful interwebs provides every Tuesday on geekcrafts.com.

As you can see by the pictures above, I love food…  it’s been more difficult for the last 16 weeks as I’ve been thrust into various states of nausea by my pregnancy, but this is one recipe that even a toilet bowl hugging pregnant woman will appreciate.

The name comes from when I made one of these cakes to take to work one Friday, and while I was off teaching one of my colleagues came came and sneaked a piece. She left me a note, it read
“Sorry Sam, I stole some cake. looks like shit, tastes like hevean, heaven.”
The spelling error was even more funny at the time as I’m an RE teacher… but enough about me… lets talk about cake.

Looks like Sh*t Tastes Like Heaven Cake.

You will need:
a cake or loaf tin, greaseproof paper, butter for greasing the tin

160g good quality dark chocolate (60%+ cocoa solids)
160g butter
1tbsp instant coffe granules (or, if you’re REALLY heavy metal, I used 1/2 shot espresso! BOOYAH)
68g Self raising flour
68g plain flour
1/4 tsp bicarb of soda
160g dark muscovado sugar
160g caster sugar
25g cocoa powder
3 medium eggs.

This recipe will take about 30 mins to prepare and then around 1hr 30 mins to bake… it’s worth it.

I copped out and bought ready made frosting, to be honest, the amount of effort you put into this cake you won’t want to be bothered making your own icing. You can buy it in tubs in the home baking isle of the supermarket and to be honest, it’s great!

If you’re thinking my measurements are a bit strange that’s because I had to modify the quantities of the original recipe to fit in the loaf tin, this cake mix is quite sloppy, and if it rises over the top of your cake tin it will drip off the edges and burn all over the bottom of your oven. You will be well advised to put a baking tray in the bottom of the oven just in case… oven cleaning is no one’s favourite activity.

(1) Preheat the oven to – fan 140c – conventional 160c and gas mark 3. Remember to put a baking tray in the bottom in case your cake mix rises over the tin.
(2) Butter and line your cake tin/loaf tin.
(3) Melt the chocolate and butter in a bain marie. Half fill a pan full of water and place a (heatproof!) dish on top, bring the water up to a boil then simmer, and while simmering stir the chocolate and butter in the bowl until it melts. Don’t get water into the chocolate dumb ass! when it’s melted add in the espresso or coffee granules dissolved in a tiny bit of water.
(4)  In another bowl, mix the 2 flours, bicarb of soda, sugars and cocoa. I would use a sieve to sift these dry ingredients. You might find the muscovado sugar doesn’t sift too well… just do your best… it’ll be right.
(5) beat your eggs, then add the egg and chocolate mixture into the dry ingredients (it’s probably a good idea to turn off the chocolate-melting-pan a couple of minutes before you do this, just in case you accidentally cook the egg 🙂 ) Stir until you have a runny but smooth consistency (told you it was runny)
(6) whack it in the cake tin and chuck it in the oven. Bake for 1hr 25/1hr 30 mins. As always with cakes, if you stab it with a knife your knife should come out clean, the top should be firm, don’t open the oven door if you can help it, but after the first hour or so it’s probably a good idea to have a quick check to make sure it’s not burning.

My cake sank like a battleship, don’t worry, who the hell cares, even if it looks like sh*t it’ll taste like hevean heaven. Leave it to cool then add some pre-made chocolate frosting. Eat within a week… it won’t last that long.

 x G

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